Better late than never" is a saying that aptly describes a woman who has just
delivered a set of twins 20 years after marriage, according to Punch.
Mrs. Omobola Bello's expectations on her wedding day, 20 years ago,
was to become a mother within the next one or two years. But she had to wait
till after her 53rd birthday to experience the joy of motherhood.
One could not ignore the joy that radiated from her as she responded to
pleasantries from well-wishers who came visiting at the St. Ives Specialist
Hospital, Ikeja, Lagos, where she has just delivered a set of twins.
Bello said she conceived the two boys through In-Vitro Fertilisation, an
assisted reproductive procedure usually offered to women with fertility
challenges.
Bello, who spoke to our correspondent in the company of her husband, Gbenga,
at the hospital in Lagos on Monday, said she had been married for 20 years
before having the babies through the procedure.
Initially, she had wanted to speak on condition of anonymity because she did
not want any stigma attached to her and the babies. But she changed her mind
after she realised that her story could encourage other childless couples. She
agreed to speak with our correspondent on condition that her photograph would
not be published.
"After 20 years of pain, shame, disgrace and many moments of tears, pressure
from within and outside the family, I'm now Mama Ibeji. There was pressure,
pressure here and there. It has been a trying 20 years, but I held on to God.
I
was always surrounded by other people's children calling me Big Mummy, but now
I'm now a real mummy. I'm just happy that this day has come to pass," she says.
Narrating her ordeal, Bello said that apart from pressure from her husband's
family, which led to the crash of her first marriage, she also lost money to
quacks who claimed they could assist her to get pregnant.
She said, "In this country, a union is said to be successful only when there
is a child. The absence of a child led to the failure of my first marriage. I
lost so much, financially, as people with many claims wanted to assist me to
have a baby.
"In fact, I had saved money to do IVF some years ago, but just when I was
about to do that, another doctor came up with another plan that ate up all my
savings but produced no result."
Her breakthrough came when she read in a newspaper that the hospital was
offering subsidised IVF services to childless couples and she had benefitted
from the bonanza though she was broke.
Bello said, "I came in last September, and asked for the CMD because I did
not even have the money to pay for the subsidised treatment.
We got talking and
he accepted to enroll me. He could not even reconcile my stature with my age,
but I started the procedure and it was successful."
Bello, who described her story as a miracle, urged other women with fertility
challenges to seek medical attention early, adding that they should also embrace
IVF - a procedure that has, so far, produced over one million babies worldwide.
She advised childless couples to shun all myths and taboos associated with
IVF or babies born through the procedure, saying though initially, she had
wanted to do it, her friends and relations, as well as some health care
professionals, erroneously told her that it was not a viable option.
Bello said, "I want to urge all mothers that have been waiting out there, no
matter their religion, to hold on to God and to also seek medical help early in
the right place, because I was exploited several times but I did not give up in
spite of my age and circumstance.
"I waited for over 20 years.
IVF is not a taboo; and in my case, for the
shame of my life, God gave me double. I have two boys. I thank the hospital,
they are not after money; otherwise, they would not have registered me because I
did not have money to pay.
"I also want to thank my husband. He held on with me and even told me that I
should go for the procedure though we had saved for it initially but diverted
the money to other needs. He insisted I did it and, see the result!"
The elated father, Gbenga, also called on couples to stick together when
waiting for the fruit of the womb and also seek orthodox means to avoid being
exploited like they were.
He said he was able to resist any pressure because they were childhood
friends.
"Our society is such that most explanations for infertility are in the
spiritual, traditional or cultural realms. Fasting and prayer is usually
regarded as the only solution because we had initially saved money for IVF, but
somebody told us not to try it and suggested something else.
"But last year, when we didn't even have any money, we saw the light. It was
like we were in the dark and someone shined the light in our faces, but we did
not have the resources.
We thank the foundation and the hospital that gave us a
chance in spite of our financial difficulty."
Meanwhile, the Chief Medical Director, St. Ives Specialist Hospital and the
Foundation, Dr. Tunde Okewale, said the conception could be considered a
breakthrough, as it was more difficult for women to conceive through IVF as they
grow older.
According to him, the chances of a woman having a baby through IVF after age
50 are between zero and 50 per cent.
Due to cultural beliefs associated with
infertility in Nigeria, most women who need it do not access it early and when
they do, they often come late to the hospital.
He warns, "If you are between 25 and 35years, your chance of not achieving
pregnancy through IVF is 25 per cent; at 35-40 years, it's a 40 per cent chance
that it will not work. If you are above 50, then it's zero to 50 per cent
chances of failure. That is why it is important for a woman to seek IVF or other
assisted reproductive procedures as early as possible.
"I have heard patients say IVF does not work, but we must know that success
depends on how early they come. In Nigeria, when a 30-year-old is told that she
needs IVF, she would rather go to her pastor or spiritual father and fast and
pray to reject it.
The longer couples wait, the higher the risk of not achieving
conception."
Okewale, a UK-trained gynaecologist, noted that infertility was on the
increase in both men and women globally. He said new factors were increasing its
prevalence in Nigeria.
He also noted that due to increasing quest for advanced education among
women, more females are getting married late.
He added that the rate of infections, especially sexually-transmitted ones,
was increasing and that due to abuse of antibiotics used to treat these
infections, more men were finding it difficult to impregnate their wives.
The specialist said, "More girls are getting educated and even at the
advanced stages, they are getting empowered and they delay getting married to
cope with the demands.
The earlier a woman gets married and starts having
babies, the better for her.
"For men, infection is on the rise and they are not easy to treat because
Nigerians abuse antibiotics such that when they have the infections and they use
antibiotics, it does not work.
"Untreated gonorrhoea causes low sperm count in men. Also, Chlamydia is an
infection which has no symptoms; it blocks the fallopian tubes in women and
reduces sperm count in men. It is not easily treated when discovered late.
I
advise people to undergo gynaecological screening at least once a year for early
detection."
Okewale also stressed that Nigerians were becoming more obese, and that being
overweight was a predisposing factor for infertility.
He said, "Fat in a woman predisposes her to choleretic ovaries, which cause
infertility. Fat in men reduces the production of the hormone, testosterone,
which is crucial to male fertility."
He advised fertility-challenged couples to undergo the procedure not just as
an option but as a solution.
Okewale also called on government to make provisions for subsidy for more
childless couples to access assisted reproductive services to reduce cases of
divorce due to childlessness and improve family ties.
"IVF is just as important in medicine as a kidney transplant; it produces a
baby or babies and the cost cannot be quantified.
A transplant is like N6m, but
a round of IVF is between N650,000 and N1m for a cycle.
"So, it's expensive globally; but if government can subsidise it for couples
who need it, then more women can access it like it is done in developed
countries where governments see it as a social responsibility. Infertility has
broken many homes and that should not continue to be the case in Nigeria,"
Okewale noted.
God is good, he is great there is nothing he cannot do.
ReplyDeleteThere is nothing God cannot do, he is more than able.
ReplyDeleteOh yes he is, the story is encouraging. do not give up.
ReplyDelete20 years of sorrow, ridicule and emotional torture, I can relate to that,I have being in your shoes. I don't know you but am happy for you. Continue to dance and praise God. Glory be to God in the most high.
ReplyDelete