My husband could’t have been married to another woman — Bisi fayemi

Wife of the Ekiti State governor, Chief (Mrs.) Bisi Adeleye-Fayemi, speaks with SAM NWAOKO on issues germane to political situation of the state. Excerpts:
WHAT are your two books, Speaking Above a Whisper and Speaking for Myself, all about?
Speaking Above a Whisper is my autobiography. That was the hard one to write because it involved a lot of reflections, trying to go down memory lane, putting important documents together and so on. Time was, of course, a very important issue and considering the things I have to do here in Ekiti State, it was very difficult to find the time and space that I needed. When my husband, Dr. Kayode Fayemi, wrote his book, Out of the Shadows, he went on sabbatical to North Western University in Chicago. I, unfortunately, did not have that opportunity. So, I had to find time here and there to be able to accomplish that.

Speaking for Myself is a collection of essays and speeches that span a period of 23 years. The book is a reflection of different identities that I’ve had over the years as a women’s rights activist, as a culture studies scholar, as a political activist and thinker and as somebody involved in the field of social change and philanthropy.

Considering the enormous amount of activities you are involved in, would you say it was your growing up that influenced your current life of multifarious activism?
Certain things have influenced me over the course of my life. One of the greatest influences on me when I was growing up was my father. I spoke about him quite a lot and I mentioned him quite a lot in my books. My father’s love for me, his dedication to my success and his belief in me did a lot to build my self-esteem and self-confidence.

That is what I believe has seen me through life in my choice of career and my dedication to issues that are important to me: Social justice, women’s rights and ensuring that Africa and especially Nigeria finds its place in the world.

So, such important things to you have led to the Gender-based Violence Prohibition Law in Ekiti State and the state is now on the way to enacting Gender Equality Law. Were these planned before you became the first lady of Ekiti or they just fell in place when your husband became governor?
I have worked in the African women movement for many years and issues pertaining to women participation, economic empowerment and access to opportunities and the necessity of creating an enabling environment of women to thrive throughout their life cycle have been my life’s work.
So, whatever it is I am doing in Ekiti is just a manifestation of all those things I’ve involved in over the years. I have been doing all those things in other countries, fighting for women’s rights in Liberia, Uganda, South Africa and many other countries. It is the least I can do, since I’ve been given the opportunity to try and bring those things back in Ekiti State as they say that charity begins from home.

Again, one of the Yoruba prayers for their children is that ‘may we have a child who would bring good things to us. Ki omo wa ko ere oko de’le. So, this is my own way of doing that. There is no community in Africa or in the world for that matter where you don’t need to put mechanism in place to ensure that women live life of dignity and respect.

Looking back 50 years, are there things you would have done differently?
You know it’s always easy for adults to think that they are wiser after the fact. As human beings, we all do things that we feel we could have done better or done differently, but everything happens for a reason. All the good decisions you’ve made, even all the poor decisions you’ve made.

So, looking back, I’d like to think that I’m happy with all the decisions that I had made, but there are things I wish should not have happened the way they had happened. But those are things I absolutely have no control over. I think the most important thing is to focus on the blessings that I have received and they are many and I think all that makes up for the things I think I could have done differently.

Are you where you had envisaged that you would be at 50?
What I’ve always prayed for was to be in a place where I could say I have achieved things I’m proud of and fend for myself, no matter what happens to me; that I have a name that I can be proud of and that people would respond to and that I’d be able to impact on the life of others. That has always been important to me and, of course, that I’d have good health to be able to live the good life and so on.

Those have always been important to me more than ‘at the age of 50, I hope I have a house, I hope I have a car and I hope I have X amount of things’. That has not been an issue for me because I’ve always believed that anything money can buy can be replaced. Nothing can replace good health. Nothing can replace peace of mind.
So, I have hoped that by the time I’m 50, I will have peace of mind; that I’d be happy, that I’d be healthy; that I’d be in a position to give back to the community and I give thanks to God that I am in that position now.

You sure are enjoying your marriage. Aren’t you?
That’s an interesting one there. It’s an interesting question to ask a married woman. Yes, because for laws to have come up against gender-based violence and domestic violence, there must have been issues.

So, if you want to describe your marriage, how would you put it?
My marriage has been absolutely wonderful. My husband is a very good man; a deep and very private person. He is absolutely brilliant and as far as I am concerned, he is everything that every woman would pray for. He has everything that every woman would pray for and I don’t think it would have been possible for me to be married to any other man. My husband possibly couldn’t have been married to any other woman also.

How much of a politician have you become, from 2007 to now that your husband has been the governor?
Any woman who is married to a politician that says I am not a politician, my husband is the politician is not telling the truth. The fact that you are in the house, even if you are not politically active, deciding who gets to see your husband, deciding who to cook for, who to offer a meal to as opposed to who to offer a drink; who to offer Coke and who to offer a wine to, that is politics.

So, anyone who is married to a politician and pretends that they are not interested in politics are deceiving themselves. Having said that, I know that I am very politically active because I am interested in the political processes and in democratic norms and values. I’m interested in pushing an agenda and the agenda I am interested in pushing is the participation of women and ensuring that women earn their rightful place and are not just the ones fuelling the party machinery all the time with their singing and dancing and clapping, that they have their reward for their contributions at the end of the day.

I am also very interested in change, that the way our society is run changes for the better and if being involved in active politics is going to make that possible, so be it. Over the years, the word ‘politician’ has taken up a very negative connotation. That is such a shame. It is something that needs to change. I believe that with more people coming into politics, with a clearer agenda for change and with really good values of accountability and service to the people, we will clean up the political space and make it a place that people have more confidence in than what is happening now.

You recently toured markets in the 16 local government areas of the state, donating buses, etc. Why did you decide to go to the markets?
Every year, I go round the state to interact with women. In 2011, I did a senatorial tour of the state, visiting Ekiti North, South and Central, interacting with women. In 2012, I did a tour of all the 16 local governments. When I did those tours, the market women approached me and asked me when I would do something for them? And from my experience of supporting market women initiatives, I know that you cannot lump the needs of market women with those of everyone else.

They are very key to our informal economy. They are very powerful stakeholders. A lot of decisions are made in markets and politicians come to them when they need their votes, promising them heaven and earth. And once you get their support and their votes, you never go to them again; they are the ones who would be coming to meetings in your office and they never get to hear from you until the next election.

So, I wanted to ensure that support for market women is seen as a standard feature of the ongoing work that I am doing to empower women in Ekiti State. I have Ekiti Development Foundation which supports women on issues that have to do with economic empowerment. That is the basis on which I decided to design the market outreach programme. And I sought a partnership with the Ministry of Women Affairs and all the caretaker chairmen in all the 16 local governments and we all pooled our resources and decided to respond to the needs of the market women because we did a feasibility study to find out what their needs were.

So, we were able to provide them with grants for them to organise unions in their markets and we gave them a bus and the state government is going to build ultra-modern markets throughout the state to ensure that those markets have the facilities that are lacking in the traditional markets like water, toilets, lock-up shops and so on. The market outreach tour was very successful and I am happy about that and it’s something I hope I’d be able to continue in some
shape or form.

How would you say all these have affected your husband’s political career, particularly now that he is the governor because he once announced that Ekiti has ‘two for the price of one’?
I will like to believe that I have added value to my husband’s political career. My husband and I are not just a married couple, we are political comrades; we are best friends; we are soul mates and we both share a vision of a greater Nigeria and definitely, of a greater Ekiti.

So, all these things that I do are not just in support of my husband’s own dreams and visions for Ekiti State or for Nigeria, I believe that by supporting him and also making a claim to positive things, I have to support him to the development of our state and our country. It is all well and good enough for all of us to complain about the mess our country is in, about the dysfunction in our leadership, about the rot that had set in at all levels; if some of us do not choose to put ourselves forward for leadership with the clear vision and alternatives that will enable our people live better lives, then, what are we going to tell our children further down the line when we are asked ‘what did you do’?
So, what I’ve been doing is in support of my husband to add value to his administration and I deeply believe in them, not just promoting Kayode Fayemi to becoming governor of Ekiti State.

I passionately believe in those things myself because I believe the only way to turn our fortunes around as a country is to set examples of progressive leadership.

Some people also said it has something to do with your husband’s second term ambition; perhaps, you are trying to woo the market women to support your husband for a second term. How true is that?
I have been interacting with market women in Ekiti State before we got into office. I have been interacting with them ever before the market outreach tour. I just thought that this was the time to make good the promises that had been made to them and not wait till election campaign starts because that would have been absolutely terrible. Don’t forget when we were campaigning for office in 2007, the late Mrs. Funmi Olayinka and myself visited markets across Ekiti State. We did the same thing during the rerun in 2009 and I promised that we would do things for the market women and we have been making good those promises.

So, don’t you think that I would have looked extremely foolish if I had waited till next year when the campaign starts before going round markets? How do you think I would have looked then?
So, this way, they would feel that they have been taken seriously as critical stakeholders in governance. When the election comes, they would do what their conscience dictates, but what has happened now is to ensure that they are seen as critical stakeholders in the affairs of the state way beyond inviting them to public functions for them to come and sing and dance.

And where do you see yourself in another decade?
Healthy. For me, that is the key to any other thing. When I look around me and see what is happening to friends and loved ones, and especially when you look at things that had happened recently, I’ve come to the conclusion that one of the most important things in our life is health. Without health, every other thing is nil. So, I want to be healthy.